There are so many reasons why most of us are shy when it comes to socializing. Whether is due to the fact that we have come from a different family background, or a dysfunctional raising method, we are who we are and that should not determine our future. Nevertheless, when it comes to get to know people, many of us can have its concerns around socializing, and proper behavior in order to create a simple conversation, not to mention the social pressure that scenarios put us through.
On the other hand, I personally think that as a girl one of the most effective way to deal with these kind of fears is to face them until they no longer seem that terrifying. Therefore my first recommendation would be to take it easy, I consider myself as a shy person, however at some point life puts you in situations where you must deal with this, therefore I believe that the most positive systematic way to do it is to confront them gradually, on your own time.
According to Eileen Bailey, on her article Improve Your Social Skills when you decide to practice social skills in order to improve relationships you can provide a more well-balanced life. This fact is so accurately when it comes to your professional development, living alone, or even when you go out on summer trips. Social skills can definitely increase your self-confidence and satisfaction in many aspects of your daily life.
Therefore, let’s begin easy. First of all, you must be aware that if chatting to other people is a scary suggestion, start small. Start with saying kind words such as “thank you” in the store or try by giving a friend a compliment. There is no need to beat yourself on the idea of having a long and meaningful conversation with someone, try instead a charming smile.
Give it Time:
Take into account that this process of becoming a better version of yourself might take some discipline and a lots of practice, therefore try forcing yourself to be on social environments –like it or not- this is the only way for you to actually improve. Spend as much time as you can practicing your social skills, whether is with a neighbor or the doorkeeper, it does not matter really. Remember that even though it can symbolize an frightening idea, encourage yourself to start with interactions you feel comfortable with, such as getting together with a small group of family members or siblings, and so on. You can gradually try to add some new social interaction each week.
While you take your time on getting your voice reading, try by listening of what others talk about. Sometimes, you might be caught up on trivial dialogs (learn those first). Beware of those who rather speak, let them, in order to follow a conversation you must listen what they enjoy to mention. Make priorities on this if you want to improve your social skills in life, dedicate each day a couple of minutes you do not need to be over-analytic and concern about what other people think of you, but casually observe other people’s responses to determine what is working and what to discard for future social encounters.
Trying to be open to others in order to make them feel comfortable to talk is a process. Do not worry if you and them feel awkward, if they know you for a while they might get surprise. There will be faults and you must accept them when the time comes, note what did not work and try again. Nevertheless, remember that not everyone would be open to participate on your task, so do not waste time on going over the mistake, just let go. Most people will not be that judgmental about your behaviors.
Take into account to dress well. Believe it or not improving your social skills go hand by hand with your appearance. Developing good hygiene, wearing clothes that flatter you combined with a good hairstyle can help you enormously in order to feel self-confident during social situations. When you look good, you feel good and your improved self-confidence. Therefore go with open eyes open and relax, talk with the people around you, and enjoy it.
To sum up, get inform. If there is no topic in the air, get yourself a bit of current news events, Knowing what is happening in the world around you can help you to initiate or keep up in any conversation without feeling out of place.
Finally, take into account that no matter how small you begin, I guarantee your life would definitely become more dynamic, exciting and easy when it comes to get together in foreign places.